incoherent thoughts.

i rarely recognize myself anymore. i have changed so much since you left me. i have become more myself. i have evolved into the person i have always longed to be. i have broken free of your chains. you no longer can hold me down and make me subject to your disdain. i will be me. she will be her. I WILL BE ME.
people think i am shy. little do they know i am an open book. they will never know that though. never. never. never.

Uncertainty.

I graduate from college in less than three weeks and I still feel like a child in so many ways. I often look back on my childhood, this age of innocence, with a fondness so strong I can barely contain it. I still grovel over the mere sight of any remnant of the past....I am intrigued and enthralled by the beauty of being a child and contemplate why I didn't recognize the sheer beauty and wonder of it while I was still living in it. Then again, when do we ever realize something is good until it is far too late? I often feel trapped and paralyzed in a body that is unfamiliar and unknown even to myself. Time has appeared to escape me and has left me bewildered as to what has happened...Who am I? Why am I here....and most importantly...where's my bike??? Trepidation overcomes me when I look ahead, the unknown can be so eerily frightening. Thank God I have a loving Father who has promised me a future and a hope. I praise Him in the uncertainty.